Sunday 24 April 2011

My New Thing :)

Hey Guys :)

I thought I'd try a new thing, where people Inbox me a problem they have, or something that's upsetting them or on their mind, and I'll include a few of the problems in this blog. I'll offer my views on things and try and help in anyway I can, so here goes!

1.
'I kinda feel like my boyfriend doesn't care about me, he flirts with other girls, doesn't phone me, doesn't text me, nothing, but when I'm with him he's lovely, and when I phone him he talks to me, and he tells me he loves me, I've tried talking to him about it but he just gets angry with me, how do I make him understand that I don't feel like he cares about me and I'm not just being obsessive?'

I'm going to be honest and say I kinda' know how you feel. It's important that you know straight away that you aren't being obsessive. A relationship is a two way thing, and If he's not putting the same effort in as you are then he should expect to be confronted with some questions. It is quite usual to not feel as close to someone when you're not with them, if you know what I mean, but this seems to be quite peculiar. Perhaps there is quite a lot going on with him right now that he's often quite busy most of the time hence the reason why he doesn't phone you or text you, but the time he does get to spend with you does mean a lot to him and that's why things are so amazing, or maybe you just aren't on the same page in this relationship.

My Advice: No matter how much you think you're annoying him, talk to him about it. The key to a working relationship is communication as I'm sure you know. If he says he's fine and there is nothing going on, ask him if this relationship means as much to him as it does to you. It's important to know that a relationship is at the same level of commitment for both people.

2.
'My Nan Which upsets me the most, she has Alzheimer's Disease, and she's slowly forgetting everything, gets confused easily and also very stressed. It's really difficult and extremely upsetting :/'

Disease and Health in family members is never easy. The important thing you should know is that with things like this, you're not alone. Everyone goes through it in their lifetime, so you can almost chat to anyone about it, including me. I know that no matter how much someone tells you 'It's part of getting old' or whatever makes a difference, just because it's normal doesn't make it any less painful. The best thing you can do is try and act yourself around them even if it is killing you inside. The worst thing you can do with things like disease, as I'm sure you know, is treat them like they are different. Just try and enjoy her company as much as possible and don't let it get on top of you. She's still your Nan and always will be, she still means as much to you now as she ever did, let her know that.

My Advice: Try and stay positive. Just speak to her and enjoy her company like you did before she got the disease and things will be much easier.

3.
'So basicals, I think I like someone. They say they like me back but I doubt that it'll happen because of some circumstances. What should I do?'

Crushes always suck, fact. In these sort of 'Pre-relationship' circumstances it's important keep up to date on whether the other person is still 'interested'. As a teenager hormones take control and it's not unusual for feelings toward someone to change on a daily basis. As for these 'circumstances', if you like each other enough then I'm sure that these 'Circumstances' are somewhat insignificant. If you get on amazingly and you are always talking and have a lot in common and you could really see a relationship between you getting somewhere, then go for it. As with most relationships, the likely hood is that it's not for forever, but there is someone for everyone. Take a risk. That's what livings for, isn't it? Do whatever makes you happy.

My Advice: Go for it. If you both like each other and you're a strong couple, then I'm sure there are no 'Circumstances' you can't overcome. Every road in life has it's obstacles, you're the only person that can choose the road you take.

4.
'Whenever I need someone to tell me I'm not an absolute fail, they always let me down. Friends are so shit sometimes, you have the really good ones that you don't get to see that often, then the ones that you spend everyday with are complete let downs. Always chatting about their problems and managing to bounce whenever it's time to hear mine; you just wonder why the fuck you bother.'

Oh haven't we all been there? It's important you realise that pretty much everyone goes through this at some point. Self-esteem is a bitch, isn't it? We've all gone through a state of self doubt, well let me tell you right now, you're not a 'Absolute Fail'. No one is. No matter how much you may feel like giving up, or that you're useless, you're not. Everyone has a purpose. I know you on a personal level and I cannot begin to tell you how much of a legend you are. Sometimes you can't see what it is, but you do have a worth. The 'friends' that don't help you with your problems and give you their full attention when you need someone to talk to aren't friends. 'Nuff Said. Forget about the ones you see every day at school, if they are annoying you and you don't get along just don't talk to them, get your head down and study hard. That's what I did for half a year, not only did I realise who my true friends are, but I got a feeling of 'I'm not a fail, I'm doing really well!' when I saw that all the work I'd been doing in class without disruption of others had made my grades improve massively. The true friends you may rarely see are always worth the wait. Keep that smile on your face, because it makes me happy :)

My Advice: Put the friends that aren't real friends aside, put your work first for a bit and then you will also see who can't live without you and who are your real friends.

I hope I helped guys :) I just told you what I thought :D

Love you!

Until next time
Farewell, or, as everyone in shops in Wales says 'Ta taa now!'

:')

Cheers!

Connor x

Tuesday 5 April 2011

Why not open your eyes? It might help you open your mind...

Hey Guys :)

I'm aware I haven't blogged in a while, but this one should be quite a good one...

This isn't going to be one of my normal blogs where I talk about my life happenings, this is going to be a blog with one big meaning.

I'm going to start with a question, and end with the same one...

When you're done, when you're dying, wouldn't you like to know you've made a difference?

This is something that has really hit home for me in the last week or so. It all started on the 25th of January 2011...

Rise Against released their first single from their brand new album, Endgame. The song is called Help Is On The Way, and it's about Hurricane Katrina/BP deep water oil spill. Straight away I knew Rise Against had gone a step further. A band that have always persisted in writing lyrics that seem to penetrate all feelings of 'Everythings Perfect', had just written a song that, little did I know, would change my life forever.

The next string was pulled on February 15th 2011...

Rise Against release their second single from their brand new album, Endgame. This new track is called Architects, and like Help Is On The Way, it hits home hard. I've never heard a song that gets so to the point. Architects is about this world being broken, and how Our generation needs to fix it. With lines such as...

'Do you care to be the layer of the bricks that seal your fate
or would you rather be the architect
of what we might create?'

These lines at the end of the chorus basically say, You can follow or you can change things. Tim McIlrath uses the word Architect as a way of describing someone such as Martin Luther King who has Designed the world we live in. Tim basically implies that there are none of these 'Architects' left in the world, no people to go against the grain to fight for a better way.

Later on the song breaks down to hear Tim McIlrath chanting the words:

'Don't you remember when you were young, and you wanted to set the world on fire?'

Which says that when you are young you want to change the world, you want things to be the way you think are right, but as you get older you tend to just accept the world for what it is and get on with it.

Now the fuse is lit on March 15th...

March 15th, Rise Against release their Endgame album. I skip the first two songs as they are the two singles that I have avidly listened to since their release. Then I hear the song which completely changes me forever. Make It Stop (Septembers Children). This song sings the stories of 5 homo-sexuals who killed themselves after being victims of discrimination in September 2010. The entire album had a huge impact on me, all with a very deep, real meaning, but this had the biggest effect.

Lets skip forward to Wednesday the 30th of March...

Tonight I am sitting on a cold wooden floor, with my loved Alexisonfire hoodie on and my iPod on with my headphones in my ears. The same noise is blaring out of my headphones into my ears as it has for the past 15 days. Tonight I decide I've had enough. Tonight I decide what my lifetime goal will be. Tonight, I decide that everything I will ever do from now on, I will do to make a difference. Although it's ambitious, and when you read this you'll probably click off straight away, my Mission, is to change the world.

I seem to be one of the only people I know that can open their eyes. I want to make everyone else open theirs too. I want you to open your eyes and minds to the possibility that what they are taught is wrong. What they're told is wrong. The fact there are two sides to every story. I am going to use probably a very controversial example now...

I'm pretty sure everyone of you who read this will consider our troops heroes. I'm almost certain all of you who read this will think that everyone our nation has ever opposed are the 'bad guys', well are they? To every other nation we have ever engaged in conflict in, I'm certain that the civilians have seen the people that fight for their country as heroes and our troops as the bad guys. Us and other nations aren't all that different. Everyone we have ever shot and killed has been fighting for what they believe in. People our troops have shot and killed have had Children and Families. People our troops have shot and killed have been people with their whole life ahead of them to go on and do something great. People our troops have shot and killed have had everything we have, so why are they worth less? How come shooting a man who your government has told you to shoot, that you have never met in your entire life, who you've never said a word to, who you have no motive toward killing, who has a family that will cry when they go home in a coffin with their nations flag on it makes you a hero, but if you shoot someone you do know, that you have said a word to, that has done something so horrific toward you you want to kill them, who also has a family just like the 'bad guy' makes you a criminal?

What's the difference? They're both murderers.

I think it's time that people started hearing it how it is, and that's what my band will start doing from now on. Telling it how it is.

I hope I haven't offended anyone, this is just how I feel.

So I'll ask again, when you're done, when you're dying, don't you want to know you've made a difference?

Cheers! x